两人的时间

五月天最新的歌《结束终点的起点》有一段话围绕在我脑海里：因为相爱所以在一起，因为深爱所以分离。在这世界有多少的情侣明明是相爱的，但是因为现实生活很多种种失望堆积成最终分离的因素。因为深爱对方，不想再看见自己深爱的模样逐渐消失，选择在双方还没失去只剩痛恨和遗憾而选择离开。

我都慢慢开始不喜欢我自己常常开羽的天空，或许每次打开这里说的东西都是那些委屈是没有人可以分享的地步。结果相隔半年的时间，我又进入羽的天空，打着我想诉说的每一句话。

两人的时间都是我每次心里默默贪心地许下的愿望。有人一定说：你们俩不是情侣吗？为何还要梦寐原有的东西？我想只有我自己知道每次的见面都是多么地珍贵，就如异地恋一样。他，是大家的超人，扛着保护大家的重责。他是家里的主人，他是妈妈的超级儿子，他是妹妹的超级哥哥，他是朋友圈的大哥。能力和时间全部都奉献给了家人和朋友，而我呢？是他一直努力想要照顾的女人，但是每一次都有心无力。

我必须坚强，习惯一个人的生活，不哭不闹，但是这样我突然问了自己：那么你的存在是为了什么？我也想要一个超级男友，但是眼睁睁看着你忙碌到自己累坏，而我也只能默默笑着一个人过日子。两人的时间原来是我以前都必须已等待，排着队轮到我。哈哈哈，想想又是无奈和搞笑。是，我现在已经开始累，觉得我自己三年的容忍和不哭不闹还满厉害的。我这样应该是全天下最傻的女人。

圣诞节我以为应该是轮到我们两人的时间，结果事实让我心冷，但是还是必须笑笑就好。我到底要怎样做才可以赢到你的世界，你的时间，你一个人就好。是不是时候说再见？三年里期望你能够学会给予我时间，结果好像变得更加恶化。上天，请你告诉我如何呢？

18岁的相遇，22岁的成长

你是否在这年纪轻轻就想照顾一辈子的女孩？

你是否在这年纪轻轻就想随他一辈子的男孩？

因为珍惜而犹豫

因为未来太遥远而逃避

可是因为爱而勇敢，而打破围墙为了与你肩并肩走向未知的路程

22岁，

还在为自己的未来奔波的年纪

还在靠着政府大学贷款存活的年纪

还不能够为未来而做出承诺的年纪

但是已经爱上一个

也如22岁的你

还在为自己的未来奔波的年纪

还在靠着政府大学货款存活的年纪

还不能够为未来而做出承诺的年纪

因为小小呵护而温暖

因为见你奋斗而相信

倒不如说因为有你而勇敢，就算多少的困难都我们俩一起度过

18岁的相遇，19岁的暧昧，20岁的相恋，21岁的争吵，22岁的成长。

一个如男孩粗鲁的女孩与一个如女孩细腻的男孩的故事还在叙述中

To be continue...

Saying no is not always wrong

First week of the new semester is always the time u can just chill in your room and instead of rushing from one class to another for whole day. 2016 is a roller-coasted ride which brought the happiness and sorrows memories but its okay, like what people say: you need sunshine and rain to grow and after all the world outside are even more wicked and hypocrite than u can imagine.

Seriously, it always best to put yourself first in process of doing a task because human sometimes can be seem to be a little selfish and easily taken for granted if you helped them numerously. I learned my lessons today on this matters: some human beings are always depending on people help regardless on the inconvenient that person might be and felt offended if the person reject it once although he/ she might already helped you for several times with no complaint.

I never been so pissed before throughout my life (except for the argument with my bf but ya i have to admit its both parties have to be blamed with the words used are not wise and lets just not enter this issue again). Honestly as her junior, I helped her all the way from her final year till she entered the job world and finished her internships. Its not that I'm expecting her for pay back because eventually I did it all willingly as a friend and as a junior. However, I hope to gain respect when I rejecting for like once after all those helps I offered. Respect is all I need and you fail to do so. The task that you want me to do is risky because u guys did it for your own sake and willing to take the risk, but how you can expect me to do and eventually is not my own sake. I rejected it few times with nice way and politely but she just throw her temper on me with "yorr". As all Malaysians know, "yorr" is a expression of impatient and very, i say it again very upset with one's answer which not fulfilling on what demanded/ expected. 

Please, I'm not bragging myself on how noble I did for someone since I agreed on helping. But seriously? Do I deserve such responds after all I did for you? If I'm being so selfish, I wouldn't agree to help you from the beginning. I really don;t deserve such treatment who don't appreciate what I did and taking it for granted. If the situation become vise versa, will you do the same for me? I bet you can't answer it my darling. 

So, I reply her on how I felt and block her. People might say: why are you being so mean? You can talk it out and solve it. "No, I have enough of her. If she has a conscious mind, she wouldn't throw a temper on me after i rejected it nicely. And she will just keep begging for my help. For goodness sake, let me just be peace with my decision and I don't really care anymore on how you judge me because the people around me felt the same way as I do. 

"Saying yes is not right. Saying no is not always wrong." 

FIGHT FOR YOUR OWN RIGHT AND HOW YOU DESERVED TO BE TREATED.